Have you ever noticed that houses can be one of the funniest things on the planet? Well, if you don’t believe us then just take a look at some of the great jokes and puns about houses on this page. A house isn’t a home without a pun – and we’ve got great dad jokes, knock knock jokes, small house puns and more.
Here are some of the best creative house puns that will make you flip.
Dad Jokes About Houses
After my parents had been living in the same house for the past 20 years, I asked my dad what made him choose this specific house when there were cheaper neighborhoods back then. He said he couldn’t pass by this house without buying it on the spot: it was too adoorable.
I sure love this place, you could say that these four walls around us have got a lot of house-story to think about.
My grandfather made his first million selling alphabet magnets. He died rich. I guess you could say that he was a fridge magnate.
Did you hear about the man who invented the door knocker? He won the no-bell prize for his effort.
My parents had a huge argument about where the furniture should go after they moved into their new house. My dad left, and when he came back the tables had turned.
I knew I didn’t put up that bookshelf properly. When I came home, I found all my first editions scattered all over the floor. I guess you can say that I only have my shelf to blame.
Knock Knock Jokes About Houses
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Candice.
Candice damn door open? I’m stuck out here!
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Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Voodoo.
Voodoo who?
Voodoo you think you are? Let me in!
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Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Mikey.
Mikey who?
Mikey doesn’t work, could you let me in, please?
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Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Scold.
Scold who?
Scold outside, let me in!
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Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Wooden shoe.
Wooden shoe who?
Wooden shoe love to know, now let me in!
Small House Puns
I have to admit that I made a huge mistake painting my house in camouflage colors all the way around. Now I can’t find it.
Why did nobody want to buy a house in Sherwood Forest? All of them had little johns.
My wife and I had an argument about the renovations to our new house. She wants stairs, and I want an elevator. One moment things were okay, and the next moment they stated escalating quickly.
The house we live in right now is so small that putting the key into the door stabs five people standing on the inside.
Moving House Puns
We moved from a three-storey house to an apartment on the ground floor some time last year. Things haven’t been going so well anymore, you could say that it was a real step down for us from where we used to live.
I asked the estate agent if he could tell us more about the three-floor building we wanted to buy for our business. He said he couldn’t, it was going to be a very long storey.
Why did the couple start a bonfire in their yard on the first day they moved into their new home in the neighborhood? They wanted to make sure they could give a great house warming party!
I inherited some money from my father and thought I was going to use it to buy a new house, Things didn’t work out that way. I guess I’ll always be living in my father’s chateau.
What’s the easiest house to move into? Probably a lighthouse.
My wife and I booked into a motel the other night, but we were kicked out within just a few minutes. She says it’s my fault. Apparently making jokes about the hosts was extremely inn-appropriate.
New Home Puns
Why did the couple sell their new house within just a couple of weeks after they had bought it and moved in? After they unpacked all their stuff from the move, they found some awful skeletons in the closet.
A couple moves into a new home located in the suburbs. At night, they keep hearing weird sounds moving around the house. After a month of this, the couple sees a ghost walk straight into their bedroom. Having had enough, they call the estate agent, who says: “Oh, didn’t I tell you? It was a funeral home.”
It’s one thing to move house with the kids, but let me tell you that it turned out to be a lot more trouble than it was worth. After we moved house, we realized that we completely forgot which box we put them in.
I wanted to buy a house last year and the estate agent gave us the option of a house down the street that was maybe haunted, and a house in the other part of the neighborhood that he said was definitely haunted. I chose the house down the street, just because I thought it would be better to go with the lesser of two evils.
When I moved into a new place last year, the deposit was a little expensive, but at least they gave us the chimney on the house.
First Home Puns
What do you call two spiders who just got married and moved into their first home together? Well, we’d have to say that you call them newlywebs!
My wife wanted to buy our first house in the United States, but I convinced her that it was a much better idea to purchase a home in Mexico instead. I told her we wouldn’t have to peso much for it.
Welcome Home Puns
Why did the estate agent light a bonfire in the middle of the yard before he called the couple to collect the house key? Because he wanted to give the couple a warm welcome when they moved in.
Why did the snail have to book into the salvation army without his shell? Because he was homeless.
Dad Jokes About Houses
