51 Periodic Table Puns That’ll Make You Laugh Until You Go AU

Science powers most of the world, but sometimes even scientists and students have to stop and have a laugh. It’s what keeps people sane! Discover some laughter and have a better day. Here are some of the best periodic table puns that’ll make you laugh until you go AU.

Periodic Table One LIners

What’s the most dangerous thing about the periodic table? The scientist reading it.

Why are metals considered to be more fit than all the other elements? PT.

Which elements of the period table are orange? The ones that can catch fire in the lab.

Why does oxygen turn into a liquid under pressure? Because it’s very shy.

Did you hear about the scientist who radiated himself in the lab, and then got arrested for obscenity as he was leaving the place? He exposed himself.

Which element do you find as part of most living things on earth? Hatred.

How did the scientist get to Lisbon? In their carbon.

How do you know most scientists still remember the periodic table? You can see the stress in their eyes.

What do you call one of the oldest representations of the periodic table in acion? The Great Flood.

Which element was most recently added to the periodic table? The element of surprise.

What’s the worst thing you can do with the periodic table? Have study debt so you could learn it.

What do you find under most periodic tables? A regular table.

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Funny Periodic Table Puns

What’s the common element found in the upper right corner of the periodic table? Mayonnaise, but sometimes it’s mustard.

Which element of the periodic table has become known amongst scientists as one of the most dangerous? Dave.

Which element should you never bring near the periodic table? A heavy periodic plate.

What happens if you light a flame near oxygen fumes? The Darwin Awards.

What’s the most dangerous thing you can make with only three to five elements from the periodic table? Meth.

How do we know there are more elements on the period table than the ones scientists already know about? Nobody has turned the current period table around to look at the other side yet.

What do most scientists believe is the problem with the current periodic table used in schools? That it’s upside down and most schools don’t know about it.

What’s the hardest element that you can find on the entire periodic table? Crystal meth.

What’s the hardest metal you can find in the average laboratory? Usually grindcore, but a lot of them still like the classics.

What’s the atomic weight of oxygen? I don’t know, sometimes a little fat?

What’s the most important element you’ll find in a laboratory? The element of surprise.

What do you call an element that you’ll only find in most laboratories at night when an alarm has gone off and there’s nobody there? A criminal element.

What’s the warmest element that you could find on the period table? A heating element.

What’s wrong with the way in which most people learn the elements of the periodic table? That they don’t.

Great Periodic Table and Science Puns

What’s the most important element for all medical doctors to remember? Their table manners.

What’s the most valuable part of the periodic table? The degree.

Why did the scientist drag his periodic table outside in order to study it? So that it could get exposed to the elements.

What are the best elements out of the entire periodic table? The Noble Gases.

What’s the most important element from the periodic table to remember in an emergency? Oxygen, you’ve still got to breathe!

How many elements are there in the periodic table? As many as your professor says there are.

What’s the most important table you can find in most laboratories? The coffee table.

Why don’t kids make for great scientists? Because they’re still too short to reach the periodic table.

What’s the most important thing for a scientist to remember once they’ve learned the periodic table? The recipe for blue meth.

What did the scientist say when he stubbed toe on the table in the lab? AU.

Did you hear about the scientist who left his girlfriend after only three months? Apparently she was only leading him on.

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Periodic Table Puns for Everyone

Where do periodic tables learn how to be so smart? Their local elementary school.

What do you call one of the oldest versions of the periodic table? The pentagram.

Which television show gets the most credit for getting kids to be more interested in science and the way it works? Breaking Bad.

What’s the difference between a group of scientists and a group of Satanists? Where they meet.

What’s the most dangerous element on the periodic table and yet the most common one in  most residential neighborhoods? The element of crime.

Which element is most commonly known as the one to drive scientists to the brink of madness? Marriage.

Do scientists think of the elements often? Not that often, but periodically.

Where can you find an interactive periodic table? Being social at the park.

What’s the most important part of the periodic table? Remembering it.

How do you spot a noble pirate? Ar.

What do you call the 119th element on the periodic table? Not supposed to be there.

Who invented the very first periodic table? The Big Bang.

What should you do when an element of the periodic table has become unstable? Get it some help.

Have you heard the chemistry joke about salt? Na.